Okay, let's talk about Ferris zero turn mowers. These beasts of the backyard are supposed to make mowing fun, right? Well, getting them started can sometimes feel like a wrestling match with a grumpy badger.
The Great Ferris Starting Ritual
First, find the key. This isn't rocket science, but somehow it always feels like a treasure hunt. Is it in your pocket? Hanging on the garage wall? Maybe the dog ran off with it again.
Then, you sit your behind on the seat. Don’t even think about skipping this step. Ferris mowers, bless their safety-conscious hearts, aren't going anywhere without a happy rear end planted firmly in place.
Brake Dance
Next, we’ve got the parking brake. Engage it. Disengage it. Engage it again! Make sure this bad boy is engaged before you even think of turning the key. Seriously.
This is my unpopular opinion: Parking brakes on mowers are overly sensitive. I swear, sometimes they engage if you just think about parking.
Throttle Tango
Now, the throttle. Some say high, some say low. I say somewhere in the middle is usually the sweet spot. Trial and error is your friend here.
Too low, and it'll sputter like an old man trying to tell a joke. Too high, and it might launch you into the neighbor's rose bushes.
Choke Hold (Not Literally!)
Ah, the choke. The mystical lever that controls the fuel-air mixture. Cold engine? Choke it. Warm engine? Leave it alone.
Confused? Me too. I usually just fiddle with it until something happens. It's a highly scientific process.
Key to Victory (Hopefully)
Finally, the moment of truth! Turn that key. Hold your breath. Pray to the lawn gods.
Hopefully, you’ll hear a glorious roar. If not, repeat steps 1-6. Maybe add a little swearing under your breath for good measure.
Troubleshooting the Temperamental Ferris
Still no luck? Don’t panic! This is where the fun begins. Just kidding, it's probably frustrating, but here are a few ideas.
Is there gas in the tank? This is the most obvious, and therefore the most easily overlooked, issue. Trust me, I’ve been there.
Check the battery. A dead battery is a zero turn's worst enemy. Especially after a long winter nap.
Spark plug? Fuel filter? These might be the culprits. Time to get your hands dirty and maybe call a friend who actually knows what they're doing.
The "Safety Dance" (Again!)
Those pesky safety switches! Make sure everything is engaged (or disengaged) properly. Seriously, these things are like tiny gremlins designed to thwart your mowing ambitions.
My other unpopular opinion: There are too many safety features on modern mowers. I get it, safety is important, but sometimes it feels like they’re trying to protect me from myself a little too much.
Conquering the Lawn
Once you’ve finally coaxed your Ferris zero turn to life, you're ready to mow. Remember to relax, enjoy the sunshine (or the shade, depending on your preferences), and make those stripes!
Starting a Ferris can be a challenge, but the feeling of accomplishment when you finally get it going is almost as satisfying as a perfectly manicured lawn. Almost.
So, go forth and mow! Just remember to keep the key handy, the battery charged, and a healthy dose of patience at the ready.
